Saturday, August 24, 2013

We'll get there

Written on 7-11-13

Some days being a stay at home mom of two kicks my butt. I am currently typing this while Michael is in the Moby. I had to give Ellie a bath, put lotion on her, put on jammies, brush her hair and teeth, and hoist her up and over her crib all while carrying all 13ish pounds of Michael in the wrap.
My back is going to hate me tomorrow.
 Michael is 8 weeks old and Ellie is 2.5 and we still haven't quite found our groove yet. Michael likes loves to be held, isn't fond of his swing or bouncer, and needs to be held, swayed, and bounced to sleep. And if you put him down you have maybe a half hour before he wakes up. But at night time he's out and sleeps like a log when I put him down.
 Thankfully Ellie does pretty well playing by herself most of the time. But I feel like I am always telling her "Hold on Ellie" "Just a minute Ellie" "After I feed Michael" and it makes me feel horrible. Sometimes I can have Michael in the Moby while I color or play stickers with her and today we went for a walk outside and I was able to spend some quality time talking with her but I still miss the one-on-one time with my first baby. Luckily, Mike works less hours in the summer so she has a playmate when he gets home from work.
I just feel like I am being pulled in 100 different directions and I wish there were 2 no 3 no 4 of me to get everything done that I need to and be able to give everyone 100% of my time and attention. I really had to adjust my expectations for this summer and what being a mom of two would be like. Ellie seriously slept for the first 6 weeks of her life. No joke, she woke up to eat and was right back asleep until it was time to eat again. So I expected that I would be able to put Michael in the swing or bouncer and life would carry on as normal. Until he got a little bigger and started being mobile. Not the case; he's a little needier than I expected.

I had a lot of expectations about what it would be like to have a baby when Ellie was born. They were all shattered. There were months filled with incessant screaming. Nothing went the way I had imagined in my head. Nothing. But I readjusted my expectations and we made it. Yet that didn't stop me from dreaming and making expectations about what this summer would be like. Expectations that I've not let go. We really haven't done much of anything that I imagined we would do.

And that's ok.

 I think this time I was a little better prepared for what having a newborn is like; but you forget. It's been 2.5 years since I had a teeny baby who's needs are so constant and need to be met immediately. And this time not only do I have this needy little creature, but another bigger needy creature running around demanding my constant attention.

Being a mom is hard work. Being a mom of 2 littles is hard work. I'm sure being a mom of 3 is harder work! But time goes so fast and is so precious. I just imagine that it will be next July before we know it and I will have a 3.5 year old and  a 1 year old. So today-today I am going to snuggle this baby and  cherish this toddler and cut myself some freaking slack. I'm not super-mom, I'm still struggling to figure out our routine, I don't have time to be a perfect "Pinterest Mom", and some days I'm lucky to get the laundry finished.

But we'll get there.


Thursday, August 1, 2013

Michael: 2 Months

I can't believe another month has gone by! I feel like the time is just flying! We are still trying to find our groove, but I'm just taking things day by day and I know that we'll settle into some sort of routine at some point. Ellie wasn't on a schedule until she was 6 months. I don't know if I can wait that long this time!
This Month:
*You weigh 13lbs 6oz. (Your sister didn't weigh this much until she was almost 6 months!!)
*You are in some 0-3 sleepers, but mostly 3 month clothes!
*You still love to eat! You eat about every 2-3 hours (I'm feeding on demand so I don't watch the clock. If you're fussy I just always offer the boob first and go from there!)
*You are in a size 1 diaper and I think we're going to start cloth here soon.
*You do have a schedule when it comes to bedtime. Which unfortunately conflicts with Ellie's schedule. You get a bath around 8:00 and then eat from about 8:30-9:30 and then pass out and have actually given us a few 7 hour stretches!! Hallelujah, Praise the Lord!!! You typically stir around 2:30ish and sometimes Mike or I can pat your back and get you back to sleep until 4:30-5:00ish, but if you don't settle I will feed you and then you eat every 2 hours the rest of the night and usually wake up in the morning when Ellie gets up.
You still really like to be held. You are getting a little more fond of your swing and bouncy seat, but mostly you want to be next to me or in my arms. Mike can put you to sleep like nobodys business so when he is home that job is transferred to him. You won't nap in your swing, you need to be bounced and swayed to sleep and then prefer to be held the whole time. If we lie you down on our bed the longest stretch you will stay asleep is about 30 minutes. I feel like most days I spend the entire day trying to get you to sleep-and stay asleep. But I know that these days are short lived and one day soon you won't fall asleep on us anymore.

Your hair still has an auburn tint to it and I absolutely love it. I hope it doesn't change! You still don't really take a paci. Sometimes if we hold it in your mouth long enough you might keep it in for a minute or two but mostly you spit it out and look at me like I'm crazy. You suck on your hands a lot and try to get them in your mouth though. You are getting better with tummy time and do pretty well holding your head up. You get lots of practice lifting your head because *gasp* you sleep on your stomach 99.9% of the time.

You have the chubbiest cheeks and I just love it! You are such a sweet smiley boy. You melt my heart! You love to talk and coo. You are so happy if someone sits with you and makes faces at you and talks to you. You aren't too fussy of a baby, and thankfully pretty much never cry in the middle of the night when you wake up hungry. You just rustle around a little bit and move your head from side to side and then coo at me when I change your diaper. You still hate your car seat and I get stuck riding in the very back of the van trying to keep you happy whenever we go anywhere. Hopefully you learn to love it soon. Very soon!

You had your first bottle around 8 weeks and you took it pretty well. I only put an ounce in it because I certainly didn't want to waste precious breast milk if you weren't going to drink it! We haven't tried again since then so I don't know if you will still take one. Hopefully, I think mommy and daddy are ready for a date night!

Ellie adores you. She will give you a hug and kiss and say "I think he likes me". Anytime you start to fuss she says "I think he needs his brand new toy" and runs around the house bringing you little toys. Or she says "Mama calm him down". I can't wait to watch you two become little best friends!

 I love you so much sweet boy.