Monday, July 9, 2012

Let's Talk About...

...why my daughter doesn't wear a bikini...

When I was younger I wasn't allowed to wear a two piece-at my moms. 
{Dads house was another story.}
All my mom ever bought were one-pieces and it was always so annoying. (insert bratty teenage whine) I never understood why I couldn't just wear what so-and-so was wearing. Everyone else's mom let them wear a bikini
I remember going over to my friends house and borrowing her bathing suit when we would go swimming. 
Or having her bring me a suit when we went to a pool party.


I never really understood the reasoning behind being modest and respecting my body. 
I just knew that my friends who wore the short skirts and low tops were getting all the attention. 
I honestly remember changing my outfit at the bus stop once my mom left for work into a friends skirt, knee high boots, and tank top. And I felt so "sexy". (mind you I was in 8th grade and it was completely inapprop)
The pressures that I faced regarding modesty are still so fresh in my mind. 
Sometimes I still feel them. 

I think my attitude on modesty really changed when I got married.
 Before that I wanted to attract attention, even if it didn't mean the right kind of attention. It's natural to want to feel attractive and draw attention to yourself. 
One night Mike and I went out to to dinner and I was wearing a dress that I thought I felt comfortable in, but the second we got on the highway I realized how low cut it really was. I was pulling at the neckline the entire night. After we got married I became oh-so sensitive to what other women were wearing. Even what some of my friends would wear (or talk about) I found completely inappropriate. 
I think a lot  of girls don't realize that men are wired completely different than we are. They are very visual.
You might just want to get all dressed up and "show a little skin" but you could inadvertently be sending someone elses husband down a slippery slope.
And it really ticks me off when another woman is dress scandalously and could potentially be causing my husband to sin. We should be keeping our bodies for our spouses and not displaying all our goods for everyone to see.

I'm not saying that women should have to only wear long sleeves and floor length skirts. 
You can be stylish and modest.

Ultimately men are responsible for their thoughts and actions, but why try to tempt them? Why try to get another woman's husband to give you a second look?
1 Corinthians 8:13 "So if what I eat causes another believer to sin, I will never eat meat again as long as I live--for I don't want to cause another believer to stumble."
I think this is an amazing verse because "eating meat" can be substituted with anything
If what I wear causes another believer to sin, I will never dress like that again as long as I live--for I don't want to cause another believer to stumble.
We shouldn't want to potentially or deliberately cause someone else to sin. 
In my opinion, being called beautiful is a much better compliment than being called "hot". 

This morning at church I was amazed at the way the teenagers were dressing, My husband even commented on how ridiculous it was. I would never let my child out of the house looking like that. If I can see your butt cheeks-your shorts are too short. Our pastor once gave a sermon on modesty because he said it was very hard to be standing up at the pulpit preaching while there were girls in the pews with super short skirts and low cut shirts. You don't realize what everyone can see when they are standing above you looking into the crowd.

I don't know if these girls realize what kind of attention they are attracting when they choose to dress like that.You want a man who is going to respect you and cherish you. Not just lust after your body.

This is the reason that I will not  be buying my daughter a bikini. She either has a one-piece on or a tankini. (which I do have to say are much easier for diaper changes and trying to get a slippery, wet, thrashing toddler out of.) And I think these are just as cute as any bikini!

I'm not saying that it's not cute to see chubby little legs and cute little bellies in these adorable bathing suits. But if I let her think that it's cute now, what will she say when she started developing and I tell her she can't wear that anymore? If it was ok when she was little why is it not ok now?
I do not wear a bikini (not just because I have some extra lbs to lose) but because I can't say one thing and do another. There are way too many perverts in the world who would like to see little girls in their underwear. And there are some super cute and stylish one-pieces out there. 
Not all of them are grandma-esque.

Or head-to-toe

I wouldn't walk around in front of another man in my underwear, so why should it be ok to wear the exact same thing when I am going swimming??

{I understand that everyone has different views and convictions about things. This is one of my convictions. I am not saying that everyone must feel the same way that I do. Just something to think about}

Happy Monday!

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